Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Traveling through the dark

I wake up to notice that the sun had already waken up to welcome me with its full glowing face along with the prismatic color to show that he was also happy with all of my happenings. Down there from my room I saw yet another rose which was preparing itself to be presented as other did. Photo of meditating Buddha was concentrated in meditation as previous. Brad pitt on the next, was there, mesmerizing at me. I compared life of Buddha and Brad pitt before comparing my life with theirs. Leaving alone the photos, I was set to live yet another happiest moment of my life. My family members were amazed to see the organized life pattern of mine. From last few months they had noticed some drastic change in my life. My regular bathing, brushing and combing were enough for them to be sure of the change in my life. Regular cleaning of room, clothes and ironing were some strong point to support their belief. Presence of a nourishing cream, a good hair fixer and a costly perfume was some of the very important and well organized entity, of mine those day life. My mom was a curious observer of the change in my life. She was delighted to see my well prepared and organized bed. Before it was all like exploring a new continent. I used to run after misplaced shocks and shirts. But the well placed uniforms and other clothes were something which would have surely dragged one to the zone of dilemma to be sure of my room.

As previous, I prepared myself utilizing the whole leisure of time I had. The whole long day preparation was for the 15 minutes date with my girlfriend. She used to come for tuitions nearby my house. We joined for the common relationship during her tuitions days a month before. I used to wait for the clock to hit 5:00pm from early morning. Days and night seemed to be longer than a month. I was alive to notice every second passing slowly as never before in my life. Finally after a long wait, the clock presented me the time 4:45pm. I started to choose the dress and finally came out with the most matching I thought for me. Dressing me up in front of the mirror and noticing and checking out all of the odd ones was done with seer attention. Fixing my hair up and using nourishing cream in my face were the most important parts of my preparation. Choosing shoes which suited my pant color was the most time consuming work for me. Finally I got myself prepared and looked in the mirror for one last time again. I got worried to notice 5:05pm in the clock. I was sad to miss 5 very important minutes with her though we wouldn’t have talked much during the time span. Hurrying down the stairs I jumped in to the garden to pick up the rose which had already prepared itself to get presented. The rose was dark red. I compared the color of the flower with our love and promised the flower that her sacrifice will not go in vain. I was pretty much sure about our happy ending of love relationship.

Coming out of the gate I saw her waiting me in the different place. She was not in her daily waiting place. Anyway after a short walk I reached her and asked “Am I late?”. She replied “No, I just arrived from tuition “. She said “Today I am in hurry so I cannot share any moment with you”. I saw a paper in her hand. She handed it to me and said “Read it, this is for you.” Then she ran away and disappeared inside the car waiting her to take home. It was all surprising for me. I watched her car until it disappeared in to the next bent. Without opening the paper I came back home. On the way towards my room my mom asked me,” Why are you so early today? I kept my lips mum and entered the room. Walking inside room I happened to see myself in the mirror that was placed in between the door and my bed. Whole of the iron of my dress was blown. The hair which was fixed up was all disarrayed and the nourishing cream was clearly visible in my face. I was amazed to see my unlaced shoes and torn pant. Changing my dress, I opened the letter. I was floored when I read the letter which was like this:

Dear...........,

'I am sorry to say but it was to happen. I don’t have any sort of love feelings left inside me, for you now. So, I think it’s better to detach away. I am sorry for my promises. Everything is over.'

Tears could not sustain itself inside my eyes. They started coming out as if they were hurrying for the first place in the Olympic event. Might be because of betrayal, all her promises started being fresh in my memory location. “I love you this much”, “I cannot live without you”, “I will leave everything for you” were some of the promises that standout at that moment.

Finally I concluded that “Her quest for best is perpetual and I am certainly not the best”. With all her memory freshening up I tried to sleep but could not do so because tears were boiling inside me. Later in the night I could sleep for some three hours. When I wake up early in the morning as usual, the sun was in the same mood and was welcoming me. Down in the garden I saw another red rose which had prepared itself to be presented. Photos of Buddha and Brad pitt were in the same position; one concentrating while other mesmerizing.

Nothing had changed and nobody had left except one girl. I celebrated that new day of my life with full enthusiasm. I followed the same routine as previous days. But that day I didn’t picked up the rose and let it there to enjoy itself.

One day my mum slowly whispered in my ear “I knew one day you will certainly grow up”. I also thought, it was my age which brought maturity in me. Or, was it traveling through the dark (love) which brought maturity in me?

Amol Acharya

Kathmandu University.

3 comments:

Kumar said...

Quite enjoyable journey mate.
But i still wonder whether its a fiction or a real one...........
I pray its a fiction, coz i have the experience of how it feels to be betrayed.
Anyways, it was a nice one.
Come up with some more.
Bye then.

Amol said...

Let me make my reply a more formal one. The story is purely a fiction.ha ha ha.

sansar said...

whateva it is, its so motivating... life goes on.
keep it up amol!!